


A Beautiful Simplicity

by Whatthef0ucault



Category: A Day to Remember (Band)
Genre: Fluff, M/M, Old Fic, Real Life, Teenagers, cross-posted from livejournal, i mean no offense, not my characters just borrowing, super fluff, written circa 2011
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-04
Updated: 2019-08-04
Packaged: 2020-07-27 07:14:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,023
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20041999
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Whatthef0ucault/pseuds/Whatthef0ucault
Summary: It was something that just always seemed to happen.





	A Beautiful Simplicity

**Author's Note:**

> Hi, thanks for reading my fic! This was written in 2011 on my [Livejournal](https://adtrslash.livejournal.com/736.html) account, and I wanted to have all of my decent stories in one place on AO3. Minor edits were made just with regards to grammar and clarifying phrasing, everything else is as old as I feel. Enjoy!

It was during those long, cold nights in the crowded van, in places far from home, that fifteen year old Alex Shelnutt needed something familiar to relax his racing mind. The boy was far braver than he seemed, loving the thrill of adventure that touring brought along, having a passion for music that could not be matched. He had an insatiable curiosity about the world that naïve youth brought, and with it came a breath of fresh air to a band still trying to get its start. The four other bodies in the van had already experienced the shock associated with their first tour, the pure ache of home it left in the bones and wore on the mind. It was a sickness that left the body physically exhausted, but mentally anxious, breaking away from that foundation of security that had always been known as home.

It was something that just always seemed to happen. Young blue eyes would lay awake, staring up at the oscillating lights shining into the van’s windows from the passing highway lamps. Tonight It was cold, colder than Alex had ever remembered it being back home in the warm Floridian climate. His arms clothed in goose bumps, Alex’s thin frame shook under his blanket. He was unable to get warm for reasons he did not know, the lack of control scary in itself. He had no bed to crawl into, no insulated walls around him, no mom in the next room just in case he needed her. Everything was unfamiliar, insecure, sending him into a restless frenzy.

The drummer looked over to his left, seeing the back of his sleeping vocalist, the slow rise and fall of his chest from his even breaths. Jeremy was a complicated man, having strong morals and standards for those he chose to keep close. Yet he had also felt the hurt of betrayal far too often in his almost twenty years. Alex admired Jeremy. He silently understood the complex personality by looking at it through his down to earth mindset. To him, Jeremy was simply a passionate person who threw himself into everything he did, opening the singer up for others to use him, but also resulting in the hardworking band he was in now. There was a subconscious understanding between them despite the jokes and ribbings Alex took from the whole band for being the youngest and newest member. Jeremy was subtly protective of Alex in the way he would watch over him, the singer being able to see that look of homesick on Alex halfway through their long tour because of his strong, empathetic core. He knew what Alex did at night when he couldn’t sleep, silently liking the comfort the young boy sought in him, and maybe inwardly finding comfort in it also.

Alex would work up the courage to move closer to Jeremy, taking him a few long minutes of mental preparation. The last thing he needed was an awkward problem between him and Jeremy while they were stuck in such close confines. Small, thin, petite limbs and torso would seek out the warmth from the larger, stouter body lying next to him. Alex would rest his mop of brown curls on Jeremy’s back slowly, the warmth seeping into his cheek almost immediately upon contact. He would then curl his arms to himself, resting his torso against his now human body pillow as his legs curled up behind the singer’s matching, taller limbs. The even rise and fall would stop, being interrupted as the singer’s consciousness returned just long enough to register what Alex had done. The fifteen year old would freeze while he waited, sure that Jeremy would become annoyed or angry this time, but then even breathing would return in a quick moment.

Whether it really was the extra body warmth, the slow rise and fall of Jeremy’s chest, or the mental comfort of the unspoken protection Jeremy brought, Alex would be lulled to sleep within a matter of minutes. It became a routine on the nights Jeremy wasn’t driving the van, even when the van reeked of the high heavens from the combination of sweaty house shows and not enough showers to go around. The younger boy couldn’t bring it in himself to stop this silly behavior when he couldn’t sleep, especially since Jeremy never mentioned it, or seemed to mind it at all. If the others woke up and saw them like that, it was played off as happening in their sleep, out of both of the musicians' control, but both knew better. 

It continued on as the years passed, the band simply accepting it as normal behavior after a while. Jeremy started dating his long-term girlfriend and Alex’s many short relationships came and went, but this unspoken connection was never mentioned. It made itself known in the subtle gestures of normal interaction; Jeremy placing his arm around Alex in interviews, Alex always standing near Jeremy in photo shoots and promotional videos, the hugs and gropes played off as faked homosexuality to ignore the truth under the jokes. They had everybody fooled, even themselves, into thinking their unspoken bond was all just the nature of a band, of being confined so close to the same people over long periods of time. Alex often questioned why he was so comfortable around Jeremy, but his mind was not built for those confusing questions and would thus be ignored. Jeremy’s mind, however, was so busy with thoughts he hardly ever gave his mind the time of day to wonder and analyze the unique situation he and his drummer shared. 

A Day To Remember was in Australia for the first time, such a livewire of energy running through the five musicians at the chance of exploring a new continent they had never been to before. Much like the early days of going to a new state, the boys had been crammed on an airplane for hours and hours to play their shows to awaiting fans. Alex hated flying, trying to sleep off most of the plane ride to make it go by faster, the oscillating hum of the engine loud in his ears. Jeremy was sat in the row in front of him, and Alex’s mind could not rest with the singer just out of reach, though of course Alex thought it was from the annoying crying baby in the back and the constant, useless updates from the pilot up front. He was out of his comfort zone, knowing the plane could go down at any moment, not having the security of the ground underneath him. The nineteen year old was slightly more mature now, being able to cope easier than in years previous, and he survived through the ride with the same amount of excitement about the new country as before. 

Although Australia was a success for Alex, it would always hold haunting memories for the passionate vocalist. Jeremy had been having problems with his girlfriend for a while, his constant working and touring putting a deep strain on their relationship. She couldn’t handle him being so far away all the time; it was simply unfair to her in her eyes. Despite how hard Jeremy tried to please her, how perfect he tried to be, he received the phone call while in a strange place far away from home, that the love of his life didn’t want him and was doing quite well without him. Everything familiar to Jeremy was ripped from him with those few words from her, and the singer felt completely lost. His body ached for home while his mind raced with so many questions and fears, wanting to know why and how she could leave him after all of the effort he put forth. His passion had failed him once again, and the singer took it to the deepest parts of his being, running for his guitar to redirect his love into an outlet that would never fail him.

After the long and hard-filled day for Jeremy, he came back to the tour bus and isolated himself in his bunk, not having the strength to be around the others. The band respected Jeremy’s personal space, knowing the singer needed it more than ever by this point. Alex, too, stayed away though he deeply wanted to do something, worrying about the man who had been his subconscious comfort through all of these years. 

The drummer fell asleep in the back lounge sometime later, facing the back of the couch while the tv softly replayed the menu of his Dexter season 1 dvd. Jeremy had been trying to sleep in his own bunk after his hours of writing and deep contemplation, but the singer was restless, feeling so insecure in his own skin as those questions plagued his mind again. He wanted to go home, to find something familiar in this world that had suddenly shit all over his efforts, everything being out of his control. After a long while of trying, the vocalist gave up and climbed out of his bunk, moving to the back lounge to maybe write more songs or watch something to drown his mind of these constant nagging anxieties and pangs of hurt. Instead, he found the sleeping drummer on the couch, seeing the even rise and fall of his slim, shirtless torso. It evoked something inside Jeremy that he’d never realized, something hitting him in the gut and tugging at a deeply hidden heartstring, evoking a craving for the comfort Alex sought in him. He was catapulted through his memories to those early days when they were both younger, trapped in a moving van for hours and hours. Jeremy swallowed hard as he took a few shaky steps closer, feeling anxious dread of waking Alex. He felt so empty and cold, shivering from his own disassociation he felt in his mind, only wanting sleep to take it away. The brown eyed man crawled onto the couch behind Alex, pressing himself close in the confined space. He felt that comforting warmth hit him the moment his face touched the back of Alex’s neck, his arm wrapping around the drummer’s thin waist loosely as legs curled up behind Alex’s. Jeremy’s body stiffened with fear as the drummer’s breath skipped an even beat. Alex’s mind faintly detected a larger, warm body pressed close suddenly. He smiled a little bit as he felt that slightly scratchy beard on his back, knowing it was his singer, and he relaxed back into sleep once more. Jeremy waited until he was sure Alex had slipped into subconsciousness again before he smiled gently against Alex’s back. The stresses and worries slowly left him as he lay there against Alex, feeling that old, familiar comfort seep back in and protect him from the worries of tomorrow. The singer’s heart was still heavy with hurt, but his mind could finally be slowed enough to let him slip into ignorant bliss for a few hours. 

Jeremy fell asleep to questions and thoughts on a more comforting subject, in the eye of the storm of his mind. He quietly wondered about this silent comfort Alex and he found in each other, why it was there and just exactly what it meant. Before this day, Jeremy had never seen Alex as more than a troublesome little brother that you couldn’t help but love anyway despite the many things he did to drive you absolutely nuts. Alex was obnoxious, loyal, lazy, hyper, sarcastic, ravenous, and pure fun all in the same person. He was a ball of amusing contradictions surrounding his huge heart, wrapped up neatly in his tiny, colorful frame. He’d forever be a kid in his heart, and it was something the older singer admired about him. Jeremy saw the deep complexities in Alex that others seemed to overlook, and they were very different from his own. The singer’s mind was a complete mess that night, but the one thing he did realize was that Alex would always be a piece of home to him, a constant in his life of chaos, a beautiful simplicity in his mind of complex thought.


End file.
